Pain

One of my favorite feelings in this world is pain. I have sought it out, provoked it, fought for it, asked for it, and inflicted a great deal of it on myself. Your whole life its "stay away from the stove you might burn yourself and get hurt", or "wear a helmet on a bike so you dont crack your head open". There are good reasons for protecting yourself from that type of pain, at the same time though pain is a good learning experience, and possibly the best motivator. There is no way to protect from emotional pain. Most people feel pain and want it to stop, they go to the DR. get a pill, feel better. These are all just band aides in reality they go on easy and then fall off even easier like in the shower when you are not even realizing it. Real pain gets worse, much worse, before it gets better. Some people take drugs, get a new girl, buy fancy things, or convince themselves they are ok to alleviate this feeling of pain. Some people do nothing whatsoever and just cover it up adding it to the baggage they carry around with them in their daily lives. I feel for these people a great deal.
A person like me loves pain. I lived it most of my life, I am very comfortable with pain. I frequently would put myself in situations where people who were close to me would then hate me or be really mad with me so I could reach that comfortness that comes with pain for me. I enjoyed pain so much and was used to it so much that I would go numb and detach from reality on a lot of drugs which became more and more and more over time. How many 18 year olds do you know that had liver damage from drugs and alcohol. I was never and until recently, have never been comfortable with happiness, or normalness, balance or success. Those feeling made me want to get high and go back to the feelings I am more comfortable with. I dont enjoy people being happy for me, congradulating me, or praising me. Those feeling I never experienced for a good 21 years of my life. I wanted to fail, give up easy, and make it almost impossible for myself to come out on top. So that I would feel pain and live in it.
Later on in life I have learned that pain is good but happiness is too. Just like anything else in this world, daytime daylight to nightime darkness, winter to summer, up to down, everything is about balance. Today I am not numb to pain or peace, I feel both, sometimes simultaneously, it lets me know that I am alive and not detahced from reality and most importantly sober. People these days only want happiness, with all these happy pills, alcohol, self-help books, material things and sex. People avoid pain and put themselves in worse positions to feel more pain later then to just accept the pain they are feeling right now. Its our culture. Just like good and evil there is two sides to everything. This is why marriage vows are in sickness and in health, better or for worse, both sides of the pendulum is balance, is love, is peace. Pain is not a quick fix just like happiness does not come over night and you cannot buy happiness. Pain takes time to deal with as does happiness and acceptance is the key. NO ifs, ands, or buts, no one more, last time, can'ts or won'ts, we all are smart enough to see truth and know truth but we deny truth because of the pain involved with reality. Thats ok for a while and is only natural eventually acceptance is it.
I encourage people in pain to feel it, accept it, enjoy it, be grateful you are alive enough to feel that pain and to make it your own, go through it. Of course those that are happy find peace with it and dont take it for granted because it will not always be that way. Pain and peace are a part of who we all are and in how we deal with these emotions enables us to grow and become more spiritual beings.