Past and Present

The other night I had the privilege of escorting a beautiful girl to a surpirse concert in the middle of the woods on a rainy night in Raleigh North Carolina to hear one of her favorite singers of all time none other then Sir John Hiatt. Not being too familiar with this man and his band beyong songs like "Have a little Faith in Me" and "Cry Love", the lovely lady I was with shared with me everything that John Hiatt has meant to her throughout her life, especially in her past. Growing up John Hiatt's music was always on the radio at family gatherings, trips and most of all vacations at Schroon lake with family and friends. From the opening note of the evening this girl was glowing with excitement and radiating vast energy with this love for the music, what the music means now and back then. I could see the happy childhood in her eyes, feel it in her movements, and hear it in her voice. Knowing that she was loved so much and that I love her so much now was a heart jumping out of the chest feeling. I love how music can do that to people. To bring back emotion and create new meaning for the same sound during a different experience. I also love seeing how some things never change, but grow deeper and stronger as time, which is irrelevant when you have forever, goes by.
My childhood was not such a happy one. There are no memories of lakehouses, family laughter, carefree events where everyone gets along and is "nice" to each other. I have different memories because I am a different person and made different choices when my different options and circumstances presented themselves. I dont regret any of the things that I went through because I am exactly where I am supposed to be today.....the Proudest Junkie. Although I definitely am sorry for alot of them. However, being able to see that not all people go through the things I did and that my life is COMPLETELY different today, I know someday, I will have moments that will be linked through time with my family that bring that certain type of energy and happiness to my being. Who knows, they may have happened already. I was completly in awe of being able to share that moment the other night with this particular loving girl.
The past shapes who we are today. When I venture out into the world when people meet me or even get to know me, they have no idea, not even a thought in their mind that I would be the type of person to have done any of the things I have done and been through what I have been through. I know it, think it, feel it and breath it, it will always be a part of me and in every essence it is who I am. The happy girl who had a happy childhood continues to live a happy life. She also has added a great deal of happiness to my life, which without her past I may not be living my current days or my future to the extent that I am. So you never know which moments will change your life...just showup rain or shine. I am a Proud Junkie and each day that passes that feeling grows deeper and stronger.